Forgotten Wellbeing - An Assistant Psychologist’s Journey Back to Values

By PsychValued

Editor’s note: This reflective piece is shared anonymously by (PsychValued) to protect the writer and focuses on learning, values, and wellbeing rather than specific organisations or individuals.

Woman drinking coffee

When Progress Comes at a Cost

As aspiring psychologists, we are taught to focus on progression, experience, and resilience. Rarely do we, without judgement, talk about the personal cost of this journey, or what happens when our identity and wellbeing quietly slip away along the way.

Working in Neurodevelopment: What I Learned

Working in a specialist neurodevelopmental assessment service was an invaluable experience, offering a different perspective from my previous therapeutic roles.

As an Assistant Psychologist, my work included:

·         Standardised cognitive assessments

·         Neuropsychological assessment support (including Autism and ADHD)

·         Observations across clinic and school settings

·         Scoring and interpreting screening questionnaires

What stood out was the nuance involved. Assessments were not simply about cut-offs, but about context, meaning, and being heard - even when there were no definitive answers.

Imposter Syndrome, Hierarchy, and Silence

I began the role feeling excited and grateful to join an experienced team. Alongside this, imposter syndrome quickly took hold, leaving me feeling as though I had to constantly prove that I deserved to me there.

Woman with her eyes closed - sun coming through the window

Over time, this constant need to prove myself became exhausting. I found myself second-guessing my contributions, monitoring how I came across, and quietly absorbing discomfort rather than naming it. What troubled me most was how easily this began to feel normal, as if shrinking myself was simply part of earning my place.

Working within a strong hierarchy showed me that expertise does not always equate to empathy.

This left me feeling isolated and unheard and in turn led me to reflect on how Assistant Psychologists can place qualified psychologists on a pedestal making it hard to raise concerns or challenge unfair dynamics.

Power, Privilege, and Identity

I began to see how power and privilege were not abstract concepts, but lived experiences that shaped whose voices were amplified and whose were overlooked. Being a woman of colour in this context heightened my awareness of how psychological safety is not evenly distributed. I noticed how often I adapted myself to fit the system, rather than questioning whether the system could adapt too.

Exploring concepts such as The Wheel of Power and Privilege helped me understand how systemic factors shaped my confidence, voice, and sense of psychological safety Thomas & Nobles, 2025). I noticed patterns in how I related to authority, supervision, and approval often prioritising external validation over my internal experience.

Returning to Values

This reflection drew me towards - Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT), particularly its focus on values (Hayes, Strosahl, & Wilson, 2011).

I began asking myself:

·         What do I value?

·         What kind of psychologist do I want to become?

·         What would living in line with those values look like?

These questions highlighted the growing disconnect between who I was becoming at work and who I wanted to be.

The Turning Point

I took my concerns to supervision and senior staff. After feeling dismissed, I realised I could no longer justify staying in the role.

Admitting this to myself was painful. Psychology had always felt like my anchor, and stepping away, even temporarily felt like both a personal and professional risk. However, staying felt riskier still. I realised continuing would mean betraying the very values that had drawn me to this profession in the first place.

Around this time, a trusted colleague,  unaware of my plans spoke about the importance of knowing yourself before training, because psychology training deeply challenges identity. That conversation landed powerfully.

I realised I had been collecting experiences while losing myself. I resigned. 

Leaving without another job lined up was frightening, especially in a culture that prioritises constant progression, but I now know it was the right decision for me.

What I Want Aspiring Psychologists to Know

Psychology values wellbeing, yet many of us struggle to extend that same compassion to ourselves.

Building experience should not mean:

·         Constant exhaustion

·         Diminishing self-worth

·         Silencing your internal voice

Prioritising wellbeing and values does not mean failure. You are allowed to question environments that no longer align with your values.

Pausing to ask:

·         Who am I outside of psychology?

·         What do I want?

…is not a step backwards. It is an essential part of reconnecting with what matters.

Closing Reflection

This experience helped me reconnect with who I am beyond my professional role. It taught me that growth does not always come from pushing forward sometimes it comes from pausing, to allow yourself space to reflect and respond with compassion.

I now know this period will strengthen me, personally and professionally, and ultimately make me a better psychologist when the time comes.

References:

Hayes, S. C., Strosahl, K. D., & Wilson, K. G. (2011). Acceptance and commitment therapy: The process and practice of mindful change. Guilford press.

Thomas, S. M., & Nobles, F. (2025). Addressing and Acknowledging Power and Privilege. In Cultivating Equitable and Inclusive Conversations in Higher Education (pp. 57-81). Routledge.

• Thank you so much for being part of my world. If you are interested in the stories of other aspiring psychologists, please do check out the Clinical Psychologist Collective and the Aspiring Psychologist Collective books.

  
  

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